Star Trek 11 review
I'll go ahead and get most of you out of the way. I thought it was about average. 2.5 out of 5. Nothing special, but nothing horrible. Yeah, I know "what's wrong with him".
So I'll tell you what's wrong with me. Part of it is, I have a peculiar personality quirk. If (usually) something is really popular, I don't like it. It's not so much an intentional choice as it's just something in me. I remember a few years ago when Batman Begins came out. I heard so many good things about it, I couldn't wait to see it. But when I did.... I didn't like it. I hated the Bat-Hummer, the costume and I didn't think the writers had any idea who or what Bruce Wayne is about.
So, that being said, let's get back into the Trek 11 review.
SPOILER INTENSIVE!
The Good:
Bruce Greenwood As Captain Pike, Karl Urban as Dr McCoy, Ben Cross as Sarek. All incredibly fine performances.
Zachary Quinto did a GREAT job playing Spock with the real Spock in the movie. (That had to be a very hard and unforgiving job. Playing an icon in a film with the original actor playing that same icon. Could have easily been a career killer, but it isn't)
Leonard Nimoy as Spock & Majel Barrett doing the Enterprise computer's voice.
I can really see Zoe Saldana growing up become Nichell Nichols. Quinto looks a lot like a young Spock. Winnona Rider really did look like a young Jane Wyatt.
And something that really is refreshing these days, the money spent on this film is up on the screen. (I wonder what would have happened if Paramount had spent this amount of money and backing during the TOS/TNG movies?)
The OK (not horrible, not great)
Simon Pegg as Scotty, John Cho as Sulu, Eric Bana as Nero and Chris Pine as Kirk.
As a friend said, I'll bet the original actors see this movie and go "Man, I wish I had been allowed to do things that interesting in our movies". I'm not particularly fond of what the writers did with Scotty (killing Admiral Archer's dog with the transporter. And what the @#$% was up with the audience laughing at that?????). Though once they stopped writing Scotty as a spaz, Pegg did a fine job with what he had.
Nero is not really a character in my opinion. Mostly he stands around, yelling, taking Starfleet Captains hostage and doing not a whole lot.
Pine mostly gets beat up (a lot! I think Chekhov is the only character in the movie who doesn't have his hands around Kirk's neck or seemingly hates his guts). Pine does ok with what he has, but ... for me, he didn't capture the essence of James Kirk.
The Bad:
Ok, here I go.... (and yes, there is another category after this)
Anton Yelchin as Chekov
His performance is ... ok, but the accent was way too much. He might have been born in Russia, but oh Good God. Can't abrams get him some dialogue coaching? Maybe because he's from Russia it why he over did it.
Chris Hemsworth as George S. Kirk
Not that he did a bad job, I just thought it was criminal to waste him as George Kirk. I thought he looked and acted more like Jim Kirk.
The story. So, let me get this straight. Nero shows up and has 20 something years to wait on Original Spock? So, other than destroying the Kelvin and killing Kirk's father, he does nothing for 20 years? Nothing? So he wanted to wait for Original Spock to torture Original Spock I get but he did nothing? Really? And didn't age?
Original Spock doesn't come off any better. So other than his former captain, possibly the guy with the most time travel experience just accepts the destruction of his home planet & mother? Remember City of the Edge of Forever? This new timeline has not been corrected simply with Kirk in the center seat. His planet's destroyed, his mother and relatives dead. GO BACK IN TIME AND STOP NERO AT THE BEGINNING OF THE FILM!!!! I know, I know, if he does that, then we don't have the "new" continuity. But for him to not do this is an insult to the intelligence of the character and simply make no sense. Kind of like going to a planet and throwing away all your advanced technology just "because". (slight reference there....)
Kirk goes from third year cadet to captain because he stopped Nero (with help BTW!)? Wow, wonder what they would have done if he had saved Vulcan also? Made him the C in C? Admiral? I know Starfleet has always been written as a "if the end result is good, all is forgiven" organization but that was a bit much.
Original Spock's ship from the future (or should I say Georgi's if you read the prequel mini series) looks nothing like any ship we've ever seen in Trek continuity. Nor does Nero's ship (I think both had names but neither stuck with me). I'll give you that Nero's was a mining ship, so it might look different but that's a bit much. Where are the nacelles? (the cigar shaped things extending from the original star ships, they are what create the warp field that allows the ship to go to warp)
The "cute little abrams' touches"
The Beastie Boys song when young Jimmy destroys a vintage corvette (what? They couldn't waste something worthless like a mustang?) UGH! And there was another song that came on not long after that that also dragged me out and reminded me that I was watching a movie. The creatures on Hoth... I mean, Planet Hell looking like Cloverfield rejects. Uhura ordering "slusho" or whatever it's called from abrams' other films.
And there is quite a bit of convenient plot developments. Nero's ship coming from it's time warp right in front of the Kelvan, the Enterprise being built in "Kirk's back yard" (and I still believe it was made in space but I have no proof of that), Kirk being abandoned on the same planet that Original Spock is on AND the only person who can get him back on the Enterprise (Scotty). Convenient, convenient, convenient.
Roger Ebert has a much better written review at his website. He also notices a lot of the same conveniences that I did. I'll admit that I read the review before I saw the film, so it might have brought some of those to my mind but I'll stand by seeing some of these on my own. It's not like I have a great memory or anything.
(http://rogerebert.suntimes.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20090506/REVIEWS/905069997).
And I didn't notice until just now that he & I both gave it the same "star" amount.
One last "cute touch". During the destruction of the Kelvin, we got a crew member being sucked into space and it's utterly silent. Ok, space is a vacuum and that's how it would be. But later, during the big fight, suddenly we can hear everything in space.
One more last "cute touch". The weird sliding camera angles that made it difficult and at time impossible to see what was going on. More than once I would turn my head trying to see where the came was coming from/going. And the damn shaky cam. I HATE shaky cam. And it's worse in faux IMAX.
And lastly a heading I can call BLASPHEMY
I love, love, love the original Enterprise design (from the original series). Love it, love it, love it. There is just something about it looks sleek, futuristic and beautiful at the same time. So, realize that changing the Enterprise (for no reason, because why would the destruction of the Kelvin cause a change in starship design?) is pretty much blasphemy for me. I don't like the changes they did and it lost it's luster. It looked like just another space ship. And the crew seems to act like this is a just launched ship. Captain Pike had 2 five year missions on it, Spock served with Pike for 11 years. Maybe they are trying to get the point across that's it was a refit but they sure don't seem to worry about that.
And no, I don't like the interior looking like the Apple Store either. Maybe this is what Roddenberry, Coon & Jeffries would have done with the money back in the 60's, maybe not.
Maybe I'm far too close (being a fan of Trek) to be objective of this movie. I freely admit that possibility, and I ask, what do I do about it? Answer? Nothing. I'll gladly watch my remastered Original Series on DVD along with TNG, DS9 & Enterprise. I do kind of wish I could be like my friend Patrick who is able to look at this and enjoy it like he does. He is able to look at it with fresh eyes and see it with those fresh eyes. I envy him for that, but I know me. I like what I like and I don't like what I don't like.
It's not horrible and I hope that this helps people discover original Star Trek. There are some good things about it and there are some good people doing good work. I want to trash it but that wouldn't be fair because of those good things. (and no, I don't think I trashed it here. If I wanted to trash it, I wouldn't have tried to be fair or mention the good things about it) There are some bad things about it and a few that I can't accept. For me, it's not the social event that it's been for lots of others. I won't be seeing it again but to give it a chance, I felt like I had to see it. Now I have and I don't have to bother with it again ('til it hits basic cable...)
Two and a half starships out of 5.
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