Merry Christmas Eve-Eve to you, Good Reader.
Having some things on my mind, thought I would share. For those of you that don't know, it's been a busy time lately in the Bub household. Mom Bub was in and out of the hospital for over 2 months (hopefully that is at an end). We are all glad she is still here to spend Christmas with, don't get me wrong. But add in work, a sinus infection and just general life and well, you can understand why some things fell to the side.
I usually have Christmas Cards for the people I work with or can hand deliver. But, this year, everybody got an electronic one. I know some people look down upon electronic cards, but I honestly do not understand why. Nothing to throw away, nothing to feel guilty about. Sure, maybe you are like my parents and put the cards up around your house. I can understand that, but you can print out the electronic and put that up if you like. Anyway, like I said, everybody got an electronic one. If they don't like it, eh.
My house is a mess right now. Trying to get things down for Christmas. Shopping, working on gifts (story I can't go into right now, one of the recipients might be reading this) and all the things I mention above have played into this situation. Given I have the next three days off, I figure to get things back on the track. I'm kind of glad that nobody comes to visit right now, nobody can see this. Mind you, it's not horrible, just looks like it needs to be cleaned.
Went to the wallymart earlier tonight, just for kicks. Kind of bored about the Fortress, so I went out to "feel the living night" as Geddy used to say. Wasn't as bad as I thought but ... oh my. The things you see. Actually saw some good things and people, so I'll just say it was entertaining and leave it at that.
So, in addition to the usual shopping, I did some extra shipping. I had been talking to an ex, testing the waters and what not. I saw something that they wanted and I purchased it for them. I got a text saying it was too much, can't repay, blah, blah blah. I said nothing was said about repaying, just enjoy it, maybe we could spend some time together soon. Then 3 days later, I got a rather surprising email from that same person. Somehow my gift raised near literal Hell, it was being returned, should have never accepted it and to never contact them again. Needless to say, the slap to the face is still felt. I am 42 years old and I have NEVER had a real gift given back to me. (Sure a couple of gag gifts but that was intended all in fun) It's been a mess trying to get that gift back to the place I bought it from online with lots of headache. But to be fair, let me add something, this person's reaction involved their kids. Not quite sure what went on, but apparently it was some sort of explosion. I can't tell you everything because, as usual, I don't know it. So, pissed off (and feeling pissed on), I took this person at their word. I deleted their phone number, email(s), address and off every online connection we had (facebook, google+, etc). I understand watching out for your kids, but .... I would say this person might regret ever trying to contact me for anything but I know they never will. Besides, they probably wouldn't like what I have to say to them.
Well, there's more to write but I woke up early and am starting to get a bit tired. Re-typing far too many words here. So, I'll wrap up and put this post to bed. I hope you have a very Happy "What-ever-you-celebrate" on the upcoming holiday. Spend time with your friends, family and loved ones and think about the ones who used to be there. Try to make somebody's holiday their version of the Christmas you remember from your childhood.
As always, be good to yourselves.
Friday, December 23, 2011
Saturday, October 8, 2011
Rest In Peace, Mr. Al Davis
So of you may know, my chosen professional football team is the Oakland Raiders. (sure, I was a big fan of the 85 Bears and for a few years after) But the player that actually got me interested in football was a Raider. His name you may ask? Jack Tatum. He wrote a book that my local library was fortunate enough to carry called "They Call Me Assassin". Something about that book finally made football click in my head and I got it. I honestly can say without that book, I don't know if I would have ever gotten into football as much as I have. What does that have to do with Mr. Davis? Hang tough my reader, this will come soon enough.
One thing Jack (pardon me being familiar with Mr Tatum here) mentioned was how his team was owned by a man named Al Davis. It was very obvious, very quickly that Mr. Davis ran his team and made the decisions (according to Jack anyway). And the knowledge Mr. Davis had about football, his team and what he wanted that team to do. After I finished that book, I was lucky enough to find a book by Jack's coach, John Madden. Again, one very large figure in John's book (One Knee Equals Two Feet) was Mr. Davis. It was kind of hard to realize how one person could have so much involvement on a team and it still be good. If you follow professional football, you can see how bad an owner can be with Jerry Jones of the Dallas Cowboys. (Who, BTW, in my opinion, wants to be Mr. Davis so bad he can't stand it)
I learned about so many characters in those books. "Dr Death", "Snake" and "The Mad Stork" among others. And the great thing was, they were allowed to be themselves (and maybe a few other people) by the man who hired and paid them. He was as much a character as his players. Ever heard of an owner just moving his team after the league head office said he couldn't? Let me introduce you to the Los Angeles Raiders. And then when he decided to move the team back to the original town, do you think the head office would allow it? Oh no, but you can go buy an Oakland Raiders shirt online anytime. When a Heisman Trophy winning running back decided he wanted to play pro baseball instead of football, it was a big deal. So when this running back didn't show up for the team that originally drafted him (Tampa Bay), everybody thought his football career was over. Not Mr. Davis, who proceeded to draft the rights to Bo Jackson in the 5th round of the draft the following year. I remember hearing laughs and jokes about that decision, how it was a wasted draft pic. Once again, Mr. Davis proved "everybody" wrong again. Bo Jackson was a stud running back during his all to brief football career. Still holds a record for 2 runs of 90+ yards, which still hasn't been broken to this day. (I, like most people, think if Bo hadn't been injured, he and Barry Sanders would have been the great running backs of the late 80s and 90s) Another team had a quarterback who "couldn't win" after a stellar college career. They traded him off and Mr. Davis worked some of his magic again. Jim Plunkett ended up winning a Super Bowl for Mr. Davis. A "washed up" tight end who's hands weren't good enough to catch a ball anymore? Hello starting guard for 2 years. I think the last great Mr. Davis move was him trading a head coach (never heard of that one before) and getting 2 first round draft picks, 2 second round draft picks AND eight million dollars.
Of course, Mr. Davis' moves didn't sit well with the league office and his team was seemingly punished via obscure "penalties" (the so called "tuck game") and the changing of the rules of the game. One receiver was know for using a product called "stickum" to help him catch the ball. Stickum was eventually declared illegal in the NFL. The Raider DBs were know for being aggressive against opponents wide receivers and not letting them get off the line clean. Now the receivers can not be touched for the first 5 yards. Not to say that my team didn't deserve the bulk of the penalties that were called. Some calls were just... influenced. As when a certain other city's team refused to have the police protect the referees if they made the right call. So, the referees fearing for their life and health, let that other team pick up an incomplete pass and run it in for a touchdown.
Anyway, back to the point of all this. Mr. Davis passed away this morning, after a long illness. He was 82, had been in obvious poor health for many years. Even having to use a walker to get around. He made some... less than stellar choices in his later years of players, coaches (and firing of coaches) and direction for the team. And while some of these decisions might have confused those of us on the outside, one thing remained unchanging on the inside of the Raiders organization. Mr. Davis wanted to win and would do whatever he thought he needed to so his team could win. Back in 1971, Mr. Davis had Jack Tatum drafted in the first round to replace a retiring Dave Grayson. Jack eventually wrote a book about his life, experiences and outlook that was eventually bought by someone at the Clinton Library. One day around 1983 or 84, I happened to pick that book up. Without Mr. Davis' choices and decisions, I may not be the fan or person I am today. Quite the impact for someone who never had the honor of meeting Mr. Davis. Thank you, Mr. Davis, Rest in Peace.
One thing Jack (pardon me being familiar with Mr Tatum here) mentioned was how his team was owned by a man named Al Davis. It was very obvious, very quickly that Mr. Davis ran his team and made the decisions (according to Jack anyway). And the knowledge Mr. Davis had about football, his team and what he wanted that team to do. After I finished that book, I was lucky enough to find a book by Jack's coach, John Madden. Again, one very large figure in John's book (One Knee Equals Two Feet) was Mr. Davis. It was kind of hard to realize how one person could have so much involvement on a team and it still be good. If you follow professional football, you can see how bad an owner can be with Jerry Jones of the Dallas Cowboys. (Who, BTW, in my opinion, wants to be Mr. Davis so bad he can't stand it)
I learned about so many characters in those books. "Dr Death", "Snake" and "The Mad Stork" among others. And the great thing was, they were allowed to be themselves (and maybe a few other people) by the man who hired and paid them. He was as much a character as his players. Ever heard of an owner just moving his team after the league head office said he couldn't? Let me introduce you to the Los Angeles Raiders. And then when he decided to move the team back to the original town, do you think the head office would allow it? Oh no, but you can go buy an Oakland Raiders shirt online anytime. When a Heisman Trophy winning running back decided he wanted to play pro baseball instead of football, it was a big deal. So when this running back didn't show up for the team that originally drafted him (Tampa Bay), everybody thought his football career was over. Not Mr. Davis, who proceeded to draft the rights to Bo Jackson in the 5th round of the draft the following year. I remember hearing laughs and jokes about that decision, how it was a wasted draft pic. Once again, Mr. Davis proved "everybody" wrong again. Bo Jackson was a stud running back during his all to brief football career. Still holds a record for 2 runs of 90+ yards, which still hasn't been broken to this day. (I, like most people, think if Bo hadn't been injured, he and Barry Sanders would have been the great running backs of the late 80s and 90s) Another team had a quarterback who "couldn't win" after a stellar college career. They traded him off and Mr. Davis worked some of his magic again. Jim Plunkett ended up winning a Super Bowl for Mr. Davis. A "washed up" tight end who's hands weren't good enough to catch a ball anymore? Hello starting guard for 2 years. I think the last great Mr. Davis move was him trading a head coach (never heard of that one before) and getting 2 first round draft picks, 2 second round draft picks AND eight million dollars.
Of course, Mr. Davis' moves didn't sit well with the league office and his team was seemingly punished via obscure "penalties" (the so called "tuck game") and the changing of the rules of the game. One receiver was know for using a product called "stickum" to help him catch the ball. Stickum was eventually declared illegal in the NFL. The Raider DBs were know for being aggressive against opponents wide receivers and not letting them get off the line clean. Now the receivers can not be touched for the first 5 yards. Not to say that my team didn't deserve the bulk of the penalties that were called. Some calls were just... influenced. As when a certain other city's team refused to have the police protect the referees if they made the right call. So, the referees fearing for their life and health, let that other team pick up an incomplete pass and run it in for a touchdown.
Anyway, back to the point of all this. Mr. Davis passed away this morning, after a long illness. He was 82, had been in obvious poor health for many years. Even having to use a walker to get around. He made some... less than stellar choices in his later years of players, coaches (and firing of coaches) and direction for the team. And while some of these decisions might have confused those of us on the outside, one thing remained unchanging on the inside of the Raiders organization. Mr. Davis wanted to win and would do whatever he thought he needed to so his team could win. Back in 1971, Mr. Davis had Jack Tatum drafted in the first round to replace a retiring Dave Grayson. Jack eventually wrote a book about his life, experiences and outlook that was eventually bought by someone at the Clinton Library. One day around 1983 or 84, I happened to pick that book up. Without Mr. Davis' choices and decisions, I may not be the fan or person I am today. Quite the impact for someone who never had the honor of meeting Mr. Davis. Thank you, Mr. Davis, Rest in Peace.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
Thor 2011 Movie Review
Thor (2011) Movie Review
The Short:
It's really, really good. 3 to 3.5 out of 5 Mjolnirs.
Good acting, has a "godly" epic feel to it and a good introduction to Thor for those not in the know. It's not square with either the "regular" Marvel books nor the "Ultimate" line (Thank God for that) and there are nitpicks but only for the more hardcore fans.
The Long: (Our usual SPOILERS tag goes here. Don't read unless you want the movie spoiled for you.)
Don't worry, this won't be as long as my review of "Star Trek" from 2009.
Story of Thor, former Norse god of thunder turned super hero. Thor is a headstrong young godling who is about to become king of Asgard (home of the Norse gods). Somebody (it's REALLY not hard to figure out who) helps some Frost Giants sneak in and almost steal a treasure (The Casket of Winters for those that might know what it is). The giants get stopped, Thor gets angry because Odin (his father) won't attack the giants back. Thor and friends invade, actually do quite a bit of damage before being hauled out by Odin. Because Thor won't give it up and has broken a peace treaty, Odin sends him to Earth (aka "Midgard") without his powers and magic hammer. Thor is rightly played as an arrogant jerk @$$ who just wants to eat, drink and bust heads. He's arrogant, short of temper and ready for a fight. So he arrives on Earth and learns some lessons. Odin falls into the Odin Sleep (which rejuvenates his power, something I don't think was ever mentioned in the movie) and Loki learns he's not Odin's actual son and assumes the throne. Thor's friends eventually come to Earth to bring him back and Loki sends the Destroyer (big metal Iron man looking thing) to kill Thor. Eventually, Thor gets his powers back, defeats the Destroyer, makes it back to Asgard, defeats Loki, wakes big daddy Odin up and saves the day (like you didn't see that one coming LOL)
We have some really good acting here. I was very much afraid and disappointed with the role of Odin was taken from Brian Blessed and given Anthony Hopkins. (what? upset when given to an Oscar winner from somebody you've never heard of?) Blessed was one of two actors I mentally cast as Odin (ironically, my other choice Stellan Skarsgard, is also in the movie as Jayne Foster's mentor). Hopkins however, actually does some acting here, gets a padded suit and some inserts. And damned if he doesn't pull it off. Hemworth (who played Captain Kirk's father in the 09 Trek movie and my choice to actually play Kirk in that movie) does a fine job of Thor, even without his Asgardian-speak. He goes from arrogant boy to sad teenager to wiser but slightly sadder man all in about 2 hours. Natalie Portman is fine as Jane Foster, who is now a theoretical physicist (and finally looks like a grown woman rather than a 12 year old). Loki actually underplayed by Tom Hiddleson for the most part. As the movie progresses, we see more yelling and carrying on like we would expect from a whiny little girl like Loki but he never does the total "over the top" bit.
Asgard looked much better than I thought it would. The Rainbow Bridge actually looks like one, even with the weird "observatory" thing at the end of it. We get to see some great things in short bits, Gungnir, Slepnir, something from the post credit scene that should make Marvel comics fans happy. Gee, I wonder who that guy who grabs a bow and answers to "Barton" is...??? Hmmm.... We get some set up for the coming Avengers movie which thankfully doesn't adversely affect this movie. Two great cameos (Stan Lee & Walt Simonson YEAH Simonson! They got that one right) and one.. well see below. It's actually pretty family friendly for the most part. All those swords, daggers and hammers flying around and I don't recall that much blood flowing from the wounds (though some on the people who were fighting). Oh, and the guy playing Laufey (king of the frost giants) does really good also, very creepy. Mean but understandable, I thought. And we get pronunciations of lots of Norse things that are rather hard to pronounce (I'll still continue to pronounce Mjolnir as Moe-yawn-er rather than Mowl-yer. Habit) And while it's not the Mjolnir I would have used, it's pretty darn close. (one of the few characters that getting his weapon right is more important that the uniform, I guess).
Now, we go to the things I didn't like. LOL Don't worry, I'm actually going to do this quickly.
Odin didn't loose his eye fighting with frost giants (as if a lowly giant could take Odin's eye), Loki knew he wasn't Odin's son from quite early, where was Baldar (sequel I guess). And while I would like to have seen Skurge and the Enchantress, it would have been too many characters. One cameo by the "writer" of the worst run on Thor ever! (Tell me, was Roy Thomas busy? Tom DeFalco? Ron Frenz? Dan Jurgens? Heck, JRjr? All people who did more and did it better than that hack who's name I will not mention.) I hate, hate, hate Nick Fury being replaced by Samuel L Jackson. Just change the name or better yet, get somebody who was cool a decade ago and is now best know for crap like "Snakes on a Plane". (I've just been over SLJ for a long time now. You may love it and enjoy it for me if you do) And why does Hogun's accent reminded me of the old "Excuse Please" Charlie Chan movies. The guy playing him did ok with what he had but there wasn't much.
Yeah, most of if not all of these go under the heading of "nit picking" and I know that. It's why I didn't go on and on about them. I've found that going into a movie you hope to like with NO expectations is the best way to enjoy it. For me, if nothing else, that works.
PS: One thing or rather person, I would love to see in the Avengers movie is Henry Peter Gyrich. If you know who he is, you'll understand. If not, don't worry about it.
The Short:
It's really, really good. 3 to 3.5 out of 5 Mjolnirs.
Good acting, has a "godly" epic feel to it and a good introduction to Thor for those not in the know. It's not square with either the "regular" Marvel books nor the "Ultimate" line (Thank God for that) and there are nitpicks but only for the more hardcore fans.
The Long: (Our usual SPOILERS tag goes here. Don't read unless you want the movie spoiled for you.)
Don't worry, this won't be as long as my review of "Star Trek" from 2009.
Story of Thor, former Norse god of thunder turned super hero. Thor is a headstrong young godling who is about to become king of Asgard (home of the Norse gods). Somebody (it's REALLY not hard to figure out who) helps some Frost Giants sneak in and almost steal a treasure (The Casket of Winters for those that might know what it is). The giants get stopped, Thor gets angry because Odin (his father) won't attack the giants back. Thor and friends invade, actually do quite a bit of damage before being hauled out by Odin. Because Thor won't give it up and has broken a peace treaty, Odin sends him to Earth (aka "Midgard") without his powers and magic hammer. Thor is rightly played as an arrogant jerk @$$ who just wants to eat, drink and bust heads. He's arrogant, short of temper and ready for a fight. So he arrives on Earth and learns some lessons. Odin falls into the Odin Sleep (which rejuvenates his power, something I don't think was ever mentioned in the movie) and Loki learns he's not Odin's actual son and assumes the throne. Thor's friends eventually come to Earth to bring him back and Loki sends the Destroyer (big metal Iron man looking thing) to kill Thor. Eventually, Thor gets his powers back, defeats the Destroyer, makes it back to Asgard, defeats Loki, wakes big daddy Odin up and saves the day (like you didn't see that one coming LOL)
We have some really good acting here. I was very much afraid and disappointed with the role of Odin was taken from Brian Blessed and given Anthony Hopkins. (what? upset when given to an Oscar winner from somebody you've never heard of?) Blessed was one of two actors I mentally cast as Odin (ironically, my other choice Stellan Skarsgard, is also in the movie as Jayne Foster's mentor). Hopkins however, actually does some acting here, gets a padded suit and some inserts. And damned if he doesn't pull it off. Hemworth (who played Captain Kirk's father in the 09 Trek movie and my choice to actually play Kirk in that movie) does a fine job of Thor, even without his Asgardian-speak. He goes from arrogant boy to sad teenager to wiser but slightly sadder man all in about 2 hours. Natalie Portman is fine as Jane Foster, who is now a theoretical physicist (and finally looks like a grown woman rather than a 12 year old). Loki actually underplayed by Tom Hiddleson for the most part. As the movie progresses, we see more yelling and carrying on like we would expect from a whiny little girl like Loki but he never does the total "over the top" bit.
Asgard looked much better than I thought it would. The Rainbow Bridge actually looks like one, even with the weird "observatory" thing at the end of it. We get to see some great things in short bits, Gungnir, Slepnir, something from the post credit scene that should make Marvel comics fans happy. Gee, I wonder who that guy who grabs a bow and answers to "Barton" is...??? Hmmm.... We get some set up for the coming Avengers movie which thankfully doesn't adversely affect this movie. Two great cameos (Stan Lee & Walt Simonson YEAH Simonson! They got that one right) and one.. well see below. It's actually pretty family friendly for the most part. All those swords, daggers and hammers flying around and I don't recall that much blood flowing from the wounds (though some on the people who were fighting). Oh, and the guy playing Laufey (king of the frost giants) does really good also, very creepy. Mean but understandable, I thought. And we get pronunciations of lots of Norse things that are rather hard to pronounce (I'll still continue to pronounce Mjolnir as Moe-yawn-er rather than Mowl-yer. Habit) And while it's not the Mjolnir I would have used, it's pretty darn close. (one of the few characters that getting his weapon right is more important that the uniform, I guess).
Now, we go to the things I didn't like. LOL Don't worry, I'm actually going to do this quickly.
Odin didn't loose his eye fighting with frost giants (as if a lowly giant could take Odin's eye), Loki knew he wasn't Odin's son from quite early, where was Baldar (sequel I guess). And while I would like to have seen Skurge and the Enchantress, it would have been too many characters. One cameo by the "writer" of the worst run on Thor ever! (Tell me, was Roy Thomas busy? Tom DeFalco? Ron Frenz? Dan Jurgens? Heck, JRjr? All people who did more and did it better than that hack who's name I will not mention.) I hate, hate, hate Nick Fury being replaced by Samuel L Jackson. Just change the name or better yet, get somebody who was cool a decade ago and is now best know for crap like "Snakes on a Plane". (I've just been over SLJ for a long time now. You may love it and enjoy it for me if you do) And why does Hogun's accent reminded me of the old "Excuse Please" Charlie Chan movies. The guy playing him did ok with what he had but there wasn't much.
Yeah, most of if not all of these go under the heading of "nit picking" and I know that. It's why I didn't go on and on about them. I've found that going into a movie you hope to like with NO expectations is the best way to enjoy it. For me, if nothing else, that works.
PS: One thing or rather person, I would love to see in the Avengers movie is Henry Peter Gyrich. If you know who he is, you'll understand. If not, don't worry about it.
Friday, March 25, 2011
Waiting Rooms and the relationships that happen there
So, for those of you that don't know, I recently spent some time at a hospital waiting room. My Mother had emergency surgery last Thursday March 3rd. My Father, Sister and I (Niece in and out at times) spent most of that following Friday and weekend in the Critical Care Waiting Area of the hospital. Just some background, you get 5 visits a day when someone is in the CCU. 11am, 1pm, 3pm, 5.30pm and 7.30 pm. (guess those times kind of burned into my brain, huh?) And then the rest of the time, you spend either waiting or making plans on what to do after the next visit. Waiting. What an ugly word. And such a waste of time. Waiting. You can read, watch tv, listen to music, talk and sleep, among other things. But it seems like always, there is more time to wait. I would also add, talk and text on your phone. Let me tell you something, I have some damn awesome friends. Wonderful messages of support and, well, love I'll not soon forget. The one that really got to me was one that said, "You name it, it is done". Not "what do you need" or "when I can", but just name it. I can't express how much that one message and friend touched my heart. But, back to our subject.
You wait. You see the same people over and over. I started calling them "my fellow survivors". Sometimes you strike up conversations with these people, sometimes it's a respectful distance. There were two groups in particular. One was an older gentleman, I would guess about 60 or so. Nice guy, his wife was in the CCU. I never did find out what for. And there was another group that my Dad got to know. (My Dad has never met a stranger, let me tell you) I don't know any of their names or their backgrounds. But, much like friends who have gone through experiences together, we had a bond. And with that bond, shared compassion. Not once did anyone show rudeness or insensitivity towards one another. Not to say we all song "Kumbaya" every night or held each other during the waiting between visits. But we would see each other in the halls and I would usually nod at them. They would acknowledge, maybe smile back or wave. But like I said, we had that bond. We were all waiting. I remember running into the gentleman I mentioned earlier after my Mother had been released to a room. We talked for a minute and I asked how his wife was doing. He said they hoped to be in a room in the next day or so. Told him I would keep his family in my thoughts and prayers, he thanked me and I got on the elevator. And, not meaning to, I went back to "my life". I don't know if his wife got better or if they are home. I hope so, I hope all the people who's lives crossed in that waiting room are home with loved ones getting better. The realist in me doubts it, but the optimist says to believe. I'm trying to let the optimist win this one.
Now, back to the messages from friends and family I/we received. So many well wishers, some family I didn't recognize but thanked them all the same. One member of my family I hadn't spoken to in a few years reached out. I like to think that was meant to happen. Not the sickness so much but that God used that sickness to help heal old wounds. It makes me feel better and believe that this crazy old universe has some reason to it. I personally got messages from as far away as Nashville, Memphis and Chattanooga. And I truly believe that if I had asked, any of those people that were medically able to make it, would have been there. I'm not a big "lean on someone's shoulder" type. Guess I'm more the classical male role and being stoic. Which leads me to my next "story".
Spent that Friday night at the hospital, which made Saturday a long, dull, boring day. Had talked to someone who had made a big deal about "if I needed them". Went on and on about it. Could have seen a friendly face and the hospital was on their way home. I was going to tell them, "you don't have to meet my family or anything, I'll come out. Just would like a hug and to see a friendly face". So, in a moment of weakness, I called them. Went to VM, but since they were at work that wasn't much of a surprise. Left a message and asked them to call. So I waited. As the time passed, I went out to my car to charge my phone and hopefully meet my "friend". This being me telling this story, you know what happened. Never heard from them. Couldn't believe it. When I talked to them later they told me that they had turned their phone off and thought I would call their house. Really? I'm kind of confused about calling someone and telling them if they need anything to call and then turning the phone off. Seems counter productive to me.... Maybe I'm a jerk, but that was pretty much the final coffin in the nail for this "friendship". Just a suggestion folks, if you call someone to be there for them, don't turn your phone off.
So, I guess I'll wrap this mess up. Before you ask, my Mother is doing well. Healing, but it's going to take time. Like 6 months worth. I didn't realize how major this surgery was until the doctor explained it to me. She's coming right along, seems like every day she does better. Family is pretty much back to what passes for normal to us. Let me tell you something my friends, when you go through things like this, you find things out. Things like "who your friends are", "who the good people in your life are", and I would add you find out what you really believe (faith, religion). I won't preach to you here, it's neither the time, place or subject. But trust me, you think about things like that. And, hopefully, you find answers that comfort you.
My thanks to so many of you that offered support via whatever method of delivery. I/we appreciated every one of them. And let me suggest this to anyone that might need this lesson. If you feel like you might need to reconnect with someone, there is never a better time to offer support. No, they may not accept it, but remember the stress that person might be under. And, in my book, it makes you a better person for trying. Let that strength out, we need more of it in this world.
As always, be good to yourselves.
You wait. You see the same people over and over. I started calling them "my fellow survivors". Sometimes you strike up conversations with these people, sometimes it's a respectful distance. There were two groups in particular. One was an older gentleman, I would guess about 60 or so. Nice guy, his wife was in the CCU. I never did find out what for. And there was another group that my Dad got to know. (My Dad has never met a stranger, let me tell you) I don't know any of their names or their backgrounds. But, much like friends who have gone through experiences together, we had a bond. And with that bond, shared compassion. Not once did anyone show rudeness or insensitivity towards one another. Not to say we all song "Kumbaya" every night or held each other during the waiting between visits. But we would see each other in the halls and I would usually nod at them. They would acknowledge, maybe smile back or wave. But like I said, we had that bond. We were all waiting. I remember running into the gentleman I mentioned earlier after my Mother had been released to a room. We talked for a minute and I asked how his wife was doing. He said they hoped to be in a room in the next day or so. Told him I would keep his family in my thoughts and prayers, he thanked me and I got on the elevator. And, not meaning to, I went back to "my life". I don't know if his wife got better or if they are home. I hope so, I hope all the people who's lives crossed in that waiting room are home with loved ones getting better. The realist in me doubts it, but the optimist says to believe. I'm trying to let the optimist win this one.
Now, back to the messages from friends and family I/we received. So many well wishers, some family I didn't recognize but thanked them all the same. One member of my family I hadn't spoken to in a few years reached out. I like to think that was meant to happen. Not the sickness so much but that God used that sickness to help heal old wounds. It makes me feel better and believe that this crazy old universe has some reason to it. I personally got messages from as far away as Nashville, Memphis and Chattanooga. And I truly believe that if I had asked, any of those people that were medically able to make it, would have been there. I'm not a big "lean on someone's shoulder" type. Guess I'm more the classical male role and being stoic. Which leads me to my next "story".
Spent that Friday night at the hospital, which made Saturday a long, dull, boring day. Had talked to someone who had made a big deal about "if I needed them". Went on and on about it. Could have seen a friendly face and the hospital was on their way home. I was going to tell them, "you don't have to meet my family or anything, I'll come out. Just would like a hug and to see a friendly face". So, in a moment of weakness, I called them. Went to VM, but since they were at work that wasn't much of a surprise. Left a message and asked them to call. So I waited. As the time passed, I went out to my car to charge my phone and hopefully meet my "friend". This being me telling this story, you know what happened. Never heard from them. Couldn't believe it. When I talked to them later they told me that they had turned their phone off and thought I would call their house. Really? I'm kind of confused about calling someone and telling them if they need anything to call and then turning the phone off. Seems counter productive to me.... Maybe I'm a jerk, but that was pretty much the final coffin in the nail for this "friendship". Just a suggestion folks, if you call someone to be there for them, don't turn your phone off.
So, I guess I'll wrap this mess up. Before you ask, my Mother is doing well. Healing, but it's going to take time. Like 6 months worth. I didn't realize how major this surgery was until the doctor explained it to me. She's coming right along, seems like every day she does better. Family is pretty much back to what passes for normal to us. Let me tell you something my friends, when you go through things like this, you find things out. Things like "who your friends are", "who the good people in your life are", and I would add you find out what you really believe (faith, religion). I won't preach to you here, it's neither the time, place or subject. But trust me, you think about things like that. And, hopefully, you find answers that comfort you.
My thanks to so many of you that offered support via whatever method of delivery. I/we appreciated every one of them. And let me suggest this to anyone that might need this lesson. If you feel like you might need to reconnect with someone, there is never a better time to offer support. No, they may not accept it, but remember the stress that person might be under. And, in my book, it makes you a better person for trying. Let that strength out, we need more of it in this world.
As always, be good to yourselves.
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